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“Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success, that is way great spiritual giants are produced.” Swami Vivekananda
“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs
“The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is.” Winston Churchill

sometimes, i really find myself really really pathetic. things tat are suppose to be done its not done. things which are not important, i'll do it. k, tats not the main point anyway. guess this post is gona be really long and erm, no link? yeahh, anyway its not important. its just gona be a random post.

seems like only you could really have an impact in my life. yupp, i did get over it alr. in a sense, i noe you're no longer important to me. cose i noe its impossible. you have ur life and i have mine too. u may have felt bad. but i felt way worst than u. though now i noe u live ur life way better than mine alr. and im glad to noe tat too. i realised tat frens really make huge impacts in my life. some words or actions from certain ppl could leave deep impressions. you said i couldnt say a word out, and indeed i really did not. no one noes wat happened between us. perhaps even the both of us do not noe. but im somehow glad that at least i noe how to let go. at least now i noe when we see each other we wont feel weird like how i will feel weird for others who do not want to let go. though its really hard. but we've or maybe i've alr gone through it. only my true frens could have such big control over me. rmbering how my parents wanted me to quit something, over tat 1 year or so they had no control over me. but just one fren is enough to make me quit. see how little my parents have control over me?

even at my worst time, they noe nothing, and did nothing. yepp, i noe she gone through much too. tats why they dont force me. neither will i force them. but im really glad i had my frens with me. no matter how late or how busy they are. they're there to keep me company. nor will they try to ask me wat happened. cose they noe i wont say. all they noe is that something had happened and they'll be there.

i dono why am i typing all these. perhaps its bcose i keep facing the com for a long time. im always like dat. furthermore, im keeping myself in my room. not letting anyone in. so of course i'll be like dat. anyway i dont feel like going out either.

going out with my pri sch frens on fri is enough for me. im happy enough. fireworks arent something i wanna watch. so sorry though. doubt ur'll be reading anyway.

i start to feel tat stranger feeling in us. but no matter how strange it may be, there's forever this special bond between us. cose we've been through so much together, so much laughter have been shared. i realised that everytime with them i can laugh and put behind everything more then going out with other frens. with them, no matter what sort of embarrassing things they do or i do, i dont really seem to care so much. but with others, i tend to stay out of the 'fun'. no idea why too. besides netball, i tink they're the ones which can let me forget other things. but seems like we're all somehow in the same fate one way or another. we dont have any close true frens? we dont have any clique? HAH. perhaps its all our thinking or something. but still, i noe we think the same in one way or another. HAHA. some things between us will never change. like how much pauline likes to bully ppl, esp megan. AHHA. and how crazy jingxun and jiamin and megan always get. and for me, i bet u guys will noe. i can alr imagine how ur will say i am. but deep down, we all noe how each other think. perhaps yes, we all change in one way or another too. but i noe this friendship will always be there right? come to think of it, i suppose we noe each other ard 9 years alr right? though our more real friendship starts at p5? HAHA. but i tink we noe each other since p1, esp jingxun. i really dono why im saying all these lahh. but, im really really glad that i have u guys around me.

i wonder if i will have such frens in sec sch. i sound as though im still sec1 or something man. but, time flies. HAHA. im alr sec3. with juniors calling me senior-.- i really feel so old. HAHAH. though im always acting old. HAHAH.kk, watever. always being the oldest and protecting the younger ones have always been my job. perhaps thats why i always feel more comfortable with seniors at time. but ive learnt my lesson, nv be close to anyone who graduate earlier or later than u. HAHAA. kk, watever. that only applies to me.

i tink i really said alot. guess im starting to appreciate things around me. no matter how bad things could get, at least i noe ive been through good times too. seriously, those who still cant reflect as in fan xing, ur seriously should go do something abt urself. if not u'll jsut be living ur life in vain. or perhaps thats ur goal in life. to live life in vain. if u're a pessimist, i give u one sentence to add on to ur pessimistic. no matter how great ur life is, the end will still be death. ppl always say me emo or watever. but get ur facts right wat is emo. cose im not. im just stating facts or mayb even helping u to decipher life. the optimist thinking is that. though the end of life will always be death, at least u had live ur life to the fullest, use it for good things. but somehow, i tink this explanation is not good enough. yeahh, mayb bcose in my brain, theres still pessimistic thinking. so somehow i really dono why either. the answer is time again.

talking abt how much people could change. its really creepy. but still, if its someone u noe for years, u'll definitely not believe that the person change. if its me, i will not believe it either. but i noe her character. so definitely i believe wat u said. shes just like dat. even when im in the same class as her again 3years later, she also change alot. actually, when someone changes, its bcose of her surrounding. cant really blame her either. i noe u understand what i meant. shes always the younger few and we always give way to her. tats why shes like dat. even at home nobody could control her, whatmore outside. i really hope u understand what i meant the previous time i told u. perhaps yahh, its different. its really hard to be alone. but at least u shld be glad u still have her with u. in ur sch, u still have many ppl to back u up right? and u noe i'll always be there to back u up too. i always knew they couldnt get along. guess i have always been right all these while. in my sch, theres no one to back me up. the previous time was alr a good example. i really hope u guys was there instead. i noe we would have just walked away instead of just sitting there having to suffer her nags. i really dono why she'll change this way too. i still cant really believe wat i heard. i want to help u but i really dono how. cose i noe if i start helping, u'll feel worse in sch. and i noe she'll be stubborn and said she did not do that. so the only thing i could hope for is u to be stronger. stand up for urself. i noe u're not a coward. u're just giving way to her once and again. cose u always do. no matter how bad the situation is, u still give way to others. just for once, stand up for urself. u've got to let her change back to her old self. out of so many friends, u're always the one that need someone to help u the most. cose u nv ever noe how to stand up for urself.

i tink ive really said alot. no, typed alot. only a few will noe what im saying. provided they even wanna read? HAHAH. but for some assholes, no matter how u read, u wont get it. HAHA. if u get a bit of it, means u're not sucha asshole afterall. goodluck on being an asshole!(: