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“Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success, that is way great spiritual giants are produced.” Swami Vivekananda
“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs
“The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is.” Winston Churchill
Once again, proven right.
Sunday, September 09, 2012 2:38 AM

And again, im proven to be right that no one will ever understand me or understand how I feel.

Yes, I know u'll NEVER see this. Cause u dont even know I have a blog! Hahhah. But doesnt matter, one day i'll say it straight to ur face. When u cool down. Can exactly believe im the one to say 'when u cool down'. Normally, im the one to hear that from ppl.

Honestly, today when I called u, I wasnt even the least bit angry. Cause I really did thought u will come. Cause u told me u would. And I believed that u would. I do know asking u to cab is crazy. But I guess its just the price to pay for oversleeping? I wasnt even angry! I cant believe that as well. I guess I really did it-not ever going to care what crap up shit reasons ppl give for not coming for trgs. I kinda wasnt even agitated. Only up till I sensed ur agitation! I cant believe I DIDNT EVEN raised my voice!

I knew u were going to send us a msg. But I didnt expect it to be that. U sound more like u're mad at us than we're mad at u!!

I totally didnt felt like trg alr when I sensed ur agitation. Ppl who play with me definitely know this. I get affected easily by ppl's attendance. Esp ppl im so much closer with. If ur didnt wanna commit in the first place, tell me. Dont make me commit alr then ur dont appear. So what exactly am I to ur? Just someone to make up the numbers in the team? If it is, I would rather stop netball for good.

I was really angry at first. After that, I realised I wasnt angry at all. I was disappointed. To the extend that I was lost for words. I dont even know what to reply u. I felt like just sending 'im so disappointed in u'. But whatever, I know at that point of time, u wouldnt even give a damn to what we said. Actually, I didnt even know what to say to them! I didnt know how to defend u nor complain abt u. Just totally couldnt believe u did this. Like how much ive emphasized on this topic?! Worst is, trina and I just talked this out. And I totally told u how I felt abt it. And it was also u who told trina, if not we wouldnt even have talked it out! And then this? What is this man seriously?

I swear I can NEVER EVER understand how some ppl just cant manage their time properly. Ive NEVER EVER oversleep for trgs before. I did once, but I rushed down and was still earlier than coach. HAHAH. After that once, I never did dare to oversleep anymore. No matter what, that can never be my excuse. Not even for sch. It is ur fault. So just apologise and get on with it. I know this principle since p1? Cause it happened before for my cca. I was late cause I overslept. But I rushed to sch, apologise to my coach for being late and told her i'll never do it again. I didnt even mentioned why I was late. Cause it isnt a reason.

Really cant believe it came from u too. Yes, I know working and trgs are tiring. I did it before too. But just...it isnt an excuse. Really. Esp when u tell me the day before u went cycling instead!!! My god. I had trg!! And I slept only at 2+ reaching 3? And I woke up at 8?

This just shows that this team, this trg is not as impt as whatever else u wanna do. It simply show that. Not impt at all. Sometimes, im reallt curious. What is this to ur? I really cant play team sport without feeling that team spirit? I dono. I cant play if the team isnt bonded.

Arghh, whatever. I think my time is gona be up soon. HAHAHA. I mean my netballing time. No longer feel the same feeling as last time. No longer strong. No longer the reason I wanna live for. The passion is dying, and I can feel it. U guys can stop thinking that im someone admirable because of the strong passion I have for something. Not braging abt myself. But I do know some of ur think that way. Now, im just a useless bum.
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